This is my first time updating this blog through my handphone. It makes me feel hip and techy. Coolness. Hehe. Or should I use the word Poyoness instead.

About yesterday. I've managed to scratch off a couple of items from my to-buy list. So this morning, am going to search for the remaining items, and quickly come up with today's list.

Am going off to Ace Hardware to get the all the things to finish off my mural today. We'll see how ugly it turn out to be. Later.

Why I do this.

I've been cutting down my expenditure due to the economic crisis. Really.

I've set up a to-do list, and also manage some financial planning and expenditure scheme, to help me stick with it, just in case I forget or stray away from my future plan of having a financial freedom (ewah!).

So what are the things that I've managed well for the past one month?

1. I no longer buy expensive coffee (starbucks, coffee bean and etc). I save up RM45 per week, because I usually spent close to RM15 for the grande sized coffee atleast 3 times a week.

2. Limit my expenditure to what is necessary. I list everything out, and prioritise it according to its importance. So instead of buying mineral bottled water from the hypermarket , somewhere around RM12/12bottles 1.5L x 2 (RM24) per every month, I would masak air sendiri before tidur, and top up the bottle bila dah sejuk the next morning.

3. Changed all my light bulbs in my apartment to energy saving bulbs. I spent more on the upfront, but hopefully it will provide me with a high ROI in terms of electricity bills.

4. I don't wear "branded" (middle range) stuff anymore. No more online shopping for Victoria Secret undies/undergarments, no more ZARA jeans (well I restrict my ZARA jeans purchase to 1 helai setahun, during bonus time). For shoes, I love Clarks because it is comfortable and it usually lasts me longer than any other shoes. But my craving for shoes is restricted to only 1 Clarks every year, or until I wore the old one out (which ever comes first). Untuk kasut kerja, I found one store that offers superb collection with low price. SUMMIT. Freaking comfortable and you can send your shoes back if rosak and they fix it for you for free!!! Get the member card RM15 for 2 years, and you'll get 15% off for normal purchase, and if there's a sale, 15% off on top of the reduced price. Baju, back to FOS and Padini Chain Store. For padini, since the cycle of their collection is really fast, I don't purchase my baju kerja at normal price or new arrivals, but tunggu sebulan, then they'll give 50% or maybe 70% off during the clearance.

5. For handbags, I made a promise to myself that I will use all the bags that I currently own; all the purchases from Paris and around Europe (which is more than a year dah) and Bangkok; sampai sekarang ada yang belum pakai. No more purchase sampai semua koyak rabak.

6. Before this, I spent almost RM100/month on my reading materials; books and magazines. Women Health, Easy Living, Apartment, Glamour UK and all those fabulous imported mags. But now, I buy them one month late. It makes no different really, except that I get to purchase it at RM9 per mag some even RM5, because it is outdated and the store need to clear it out asap. Favourite mag store - Sun Mag @ Cineleisure. Books; tunggu warehouse clearance.

7. Store canned and dry goods. Like mee hoon, spagetti, all kinds of pasta, sardines etc, so that if am at home, and I am hungry, I can just cook something simple and filling. Tak payah keluar beli or buat delivery. I've been doing that for almost a month now, and it works. I hardly spent more than RM50 for food every week during workdays. Now, my mission is to make and pack my own breakfast / lunch to the office.

8. I want to learn how to bake. Nak buat cookies and keep it in a jar, and belajar nak buat bread (Still trying to mintak Along to sponsor me my breadmaker, so mahal tak mampu beli sendiri). So bila my niece and Mr.Snots (both are known to be avid snacking creatures) datang, we don't need to buy tonnes of snacks. It will be healthier too. Both need that extra nutrition because those two babies are still growing. Hehe.

9. I have this small irritating and membazir habit of letting the tap running when I'm in the kitchen or in the bathroom. Sebab pemalas nak bukak tutup air. Sekarang dah tak buat dah. Although the bill was never more than RM20, basically free, but it is just a bad habit.

10. Buy perishable items when necessary. Beli bila nak masak. Instead of simpan lama-lama and bila tak pakai, then ended up buang.

11. Spending lesser time at the shopping malls actually help me to curb my shopping habit to the extreme. I was never a crazed shopper pun, cuma I usually spend money unnecessarily. Now, I only go if I need to buy something, or nak tengok wayang.

Honestly, I know am not so much of a big spender before, but I never think that I can actually save up more than I ever did. All I need to do is to control and monitor my spending habit.

So proud.

It's 1.44 AM and I am still wide awake.

Normally I would go to sleep somewhere around 10.30 to 11 PM and most of my friends know that I'd be cranky if I don't go to sleep on time.

But that has certainly changed now hasn't it?

I have just finished working on an assignment for the Business Management Course for my quite-close-but-not-that-close friend who is also my ex-clerk yang currently taking up a part time Bachelor Degree Course in OUM.

I have been helping him out with assignments for the past 2 years; mainly on assignments that require much research and analysis; because I know for the fact that he can't manage to do all the homeworks that have been assigned to him and to complete it on time.

He is almost 35 years old, married with 5 kids. I'm obliged to help him. I want to help him. Why? Simply because he is a good man, and he had strived his way up to where he is now by being patience and nice to everyone around him.

When he started working, he had no high school qualification or whatsoever. A drop-out. Now he is already half way of completing his degree. If that is not aspiring then I do not know what else is.

He is a hardworking man, in my opinion, it is just that sometimes he can't juggle too many things at one go. Well, it is given that man totally sucks at multitasking innit?

Alah, lagipun not all the assignments that I have been helping him with is really that hard to complete. Some might requires me to spend more time than I usually do on research and reading, but then nothing beats the rush I have inside of me on learning new things, something that is out of my comfort zone and territory. It is a good exposure I may add, because I've always wanted to do my MBA and working on his assignments and from all the research I've done, I think I can do well if not great.

Being an engineer my whole working life, my brain has been trained to think structurally, calculatively and imaginatively (not artsy fartsy imagination but the fact that we learn things that we can't see or touch like the flow of electric current, electromagnetic field, F=M*A , A=(v-u)/t and all those engineering stuff) so it was always difficult for me to churn out big , pseudo intelligent words ;) and also business jargons to describe and to elaborate on all things business and management. Hell, I can't properly goreng and make my gorengness believable even when I was doing my karangan.

But now, I can proudly say that I can goreng a bit. Not really THAT good, but at least when people ask me about the concept of management and whatnots, I won't sound too dumb or look blurred. Kan?

Kene bunyi pandai walaupun tak berapa sangat.

I think this year alone, I have acquired more knowledge and pick up a few new stuff in comparison with past years. Ok lah not bad. Probably my next target is to read one technical book a month. (Tiru this habit from my ex-Deputy Chief Engineer and he is so knowledgeable and basically considered an expert in anything)

Sounds boring eh? But I don’t know. Just a plan anyway. If tak jalan, then just cover a few chapters is good enough. Just for a refresher course, so that the neurons in my brain could store and hold on to the information longer.

Gosh am so hungry. It’s time to find something to eat, and force myself to sleep. It is going to be a long day tomorrow.

Good nite.

You know, taking up this project would not only make my body system goes haywire, but it could actually put my career at risk. I never thought of it that way, because I take pride in what I do. But that's the truth.

What ever challenging tasks they have been given me to work on all these years, I always take it as that, a challenge. I'm willing to open up my already cluttered brain, to make space for new stuff; new programming language (not new new but new to me); and learn it all by myself through online journals, joining geeky forums and also techy books. Not even once I requested the department additional trainings although I do deserve it. But I wouldn't want to waste money and time, to sit on the beginner-intermediate-expert courses, which usually covers the basic stuff, although they advertised it differently.

I'm always keen to learn new things. Although in this company, people wouldn't appreciate it, but at least it would add colours to my bland looking CV, that has not been updated for almost 5 years.

I was warned by Mr.Snots and few others that if I fail to deliver this project, then my head would be on the line. The ones approached me to save them from failing to kick-start this project in the first place, would put the blame on me, just because I agree to help them deliver it on time.

I have faith in me. I always think positively when it comes to my work. Anything can be done as requested by the technical specifications. I just have to dig deep and not afraid of making as much errors so that I could learn more and more every time.

That's how I learn anyway. I'm willing to make as much mistakes so I can create what they want and as they want it.

All that being said, it is still tiring to work in an environment where, after all these years and your contributions, people still want to see you fail.

That is why I work alone; minding my own business trying very hard to make something out of nothing. I want to show them that I have the capability to do it, and save the company a lot of money.

Although sometimes, I always feel left out, even in my own unit in this department. Most of my peers share the same ground of work, working together most of the time, but I work alone. Because whatever that I do now and the skills I have acquired through this working years, I acquired it on my own initiatives.

Orang melayu kene belajar jangan asyik bersifat dengki.

Orang melayu jangan asyik nak jatuhkan orang melayu lain.

As much as I love what I do, but don't think that my life revolves around this office and my work life. You can put me down, make up stories about me, I don't care.

Ayah selalu pesan, kalau bekerja biar ikhlas. Kalau asyik nak mengharapkan habuan, sampai ke sudah kita tak tenteram.

That's why, when the management promised me that I will be promoted if I manage to deliver this project, I just laughed it out. Trust me, as much as that promise would make an excellent reward, but it is not the one that drives me every day to wake up in the morning and to complete this project on time. I have Ayah's words lingering in my ear and at the back of my head.

That is the main reason why I do what I do. I want Ayah to be proud of me. I want him to think that, I also have the drive and sincerity for my work, as much as he takes pride of his contributions and his undying loyalty to this company.

Kalau sesiapa yang pernah jumpa Ayah, memang tak akan boleh mengagak yang Ayah aku pernah melecur separuh badan akibat dari terkena kejutan elektrik. Aku adalah generasi ketiga dalam keluarga yang bekerja dengan Syarikat Elektrik Che Khalib. Nasib aku baik kerana ayah memberikan peluang pendidikan yang cukup, jadik kelayakan aku membolehkan aku bekerja dengan pangkat yang sedikit lebih tinggi darinya; hanya duduk mengangkang depan komputer tapi bergelar jurutera. o_O

Berbalik kepada kisah Ayah.

Ayah mula berkerja seawal umur 18 tahun. Cita-cita asal mahu menjadi tentera laut. Tapi ditentang hebat oleh Arwah Atuk kerana tentera laut bekerja berdasarkan kontrak. Jadi, masa depan tidak terlalu terjamin. Arwah atuk yang ketika itu bekerja dengan Syarikat Elektrik Che Khalib, terdahulu dikenali sebagai CEB, membawa masuk Ayah bekerja sebagai buruh. Ketika itu CEB mengalakkan pekerjanya membawa masuk ahli keluarga untuk bekerja. Jadi, hampir keseluruhan adik-beradik Ayah aku bekerja dengan CEB.

Jawatan pertama yang dipegang oleh Ayah adalah merupakan jawatan Buruh Kasar. Mengangkat tiang-tiang elektrik setinggi 15-20 kaki and membanting tulang menanamnya sekitar daerah Muar. Gaji permulaan hanyalah sebanyak RM90. Ketika Along lahir, gaji ayah hanyalah RM110. Dan pada ketika itu, dia bukan hanya menampung Along dan Mak, tetapi juga Amie, dan adik bongsunya. Ayah juga membawa arwah atuk dan nenek tinggal bersama di kuarters CEB yang menjadi tempat kami membesar.

Selama beberapa tahun bekerja sebagai buruh, Ayah dipindahkan pula ke unit substesyen untuk kerja-kerja senggaraan.

Kejadian berlaku ketika Ayah membuat kerja-kerja senggaraan di low voltage distribution board. Cutout dicabut tanpa mematikan bekalan dan menyebabkan percikan dan letupan berlaku.

Bahagian badan termasuk tangan dan kaki, abis disambar api. Ayah bernasib baik sebab auto-refleks bertindak pantas dia sempat memaling muka ke arah yang selamat. Ayah dibawa ke hospital untuk dirawat dan syukur, kerana tiada sebarang kecederaan dalaman.

Ayah tidak bekerja hampir 6 bulan. Aku masih ingat Mak bercerita, katanya, "6 bulan Mak mandikan Ayah, cebukkan dia, suapkan makan. Sikit pun aku tak merungut. Ni nak suruh pergi kedai sekejap pun malas. Ayah kau ni memang!"

Okay mungkin ketika itu Mak aku bukan bercerita, tapi merungut. :)

Tapi apa yang Ayah buat segala luka dan kesan akibat dari kejutan elektrik dan kebakaran di badan Ayah hilang?

Disebabkan pekerjaan Ayah memerlukannya berada di merata kawasan sehingga ke pendalaman, Ayah pernah berjumpa dengan orang Asli yang mengajarnya untuk mengunakan buih yang keluar dari kayu yang terbakar untuk mengubat parut-parut dan pelbagai penyakit kulit. Dari petua itulah, hari-hari Mak dan Ayah akan bakar "kayu bakar" untuk ambil buih yang terbentuk, dan Ayah akan sapukannya pada parut dan bekas-bekas terbakar pada kulitnya tanpa jemu.

Sehingga kesemua parut tersebut hilang.

Aku hanya tahu cerita ini ketika umur aku lebih kurang 15 tahun. Masa tu, aku memang terperanjat sebab tak sangka Ayah aku pernah berdepan dengan maut.

Tiga pengajaran yang aku peroleh dari cerita ini:

i) Mak memang orang yang penyabar. Aku tak dapat bayangkan macam mana tindakan aku kalau aku dalam situasi yang sama.

ii) Ayah aku dari dulu memang pemalas sebab banyak kali aku dengar Mak aku merungut benda yang sama sampai sudah.

iii) Mana aku nak cari kayu bakar untuk aku hilangkan bekas-bekas jerawat ni?